Last week I was scrolling to social media and I squealed when I saw the headline pop up, “Jamie Otis and Doug Hehner Announce Pregnancy Six Months After Losing Their Son”.
Last year, Jamie and Doug lost their son Johnny when he was born at 17 weeks and 1 day, too soon for this world. They were very open about their loss, even sharing a photo of the two of them with Johnny on the day he was born.
I had tears in my eyes when I read that she found out she was pregnant with this baby on Johnny’s due date. Talk about taking your breath away!
I love that they have been so open about their loss because we are far too silent about an experience that so many couples experience.
One in 4 pregnancies end in a miscarriage, 1 in 100 end due to an ectopic pregnancy, and 1 in 160 end with a stillbirth.
Yet, there is so much taboo to talk about the loss of your child and far too many messages to “get over it” faster than most women and men are ready.
“I'd be lying if I didn't add that we are also a bit fearful of losing our sweet little peanut, but we are choosing happiness and excitement over fear.”
While I completely understand where Jamie is coming from and strongly believe in the power of hope and positivity, there’s something else about loss that we don’t talk about enough that I want to share with you today.
Grief sets off a fight-or-flight response in your body
A particular hormone called CRH (corticotropin-releasing hormone) is released which gives you that feeling of anxiety. Other stress hormones such as cortisol are released as well and your nervous system is on high alert.
This is why you might find yourself experiencing stomach aches, not being hungry, waking up with nightmares, having clammy hands or heart palpitation when you're grieving any type of loss.
In other words, grief creates a stre